


The Astoria Case: Second Edition

by StrawberryLane



Series: The Astoria Spa and Hotel Resort [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Cheating, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Misunderstandings, Not Cheating, POV Bucky Barnes, Sugar Daddy, Undercover Missions, Undercover as a Couple, Vacation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-08 20:47:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16436483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrawberryLane/pseuds/StrawberryLane
Summary: He’s dragged from his thoughts of Steve by the sound of Tony demanding to be given the key to their suite and at the same time groping Bucky’s ass.In broad daylight, with Britney Spears standing five feet away. Bucky briefly wonders if he could bat Tony’s hands away without blowing their entire cover.Probably not.





	The Astoria Case: Second Edition

**Author's Note:**

> So this was going to be longer and more of a story but I lost interest halfway through. Sorry.

“You good?” asks Tony as their cramped sports car comes to a stop in front of the Astoria Spa and Hotel Resort.

 

Bucky nods, dragging a hand across his newly short hair. He doesn’t look like himself anymore, which is throwing him off. Short hair, no stubble to speak off and a sleeve of tattoos on his left arm, hiding the metal that’s beneath.

 

“Just wondering if this is necessary, is all,” he says as they both climb out of the car.

 

“Of course it is. I’m the reason we’re even getting through the doors to this place, but you, you’re the one who can move freely. We’ve gone through every inch of this plan from all angles, what could possibly go wrong?”

 

“Yeah,” Bucky mutters. “What could go wrong?”

 

Realistically, a whole lot. They’re posing as a couple, for starters. At a swanky, fancy hotel Bucky would never have been able to step foot inside if it wasn’t for Tony Stark and his habit of throwing his money around. Their main suspect in this weapons smuggling case is the manager of the hotel and Thomas Whiting has a reputation for only descending among the guests if there’s someone rich and famous enough to bring the hotel massive publicity by staying there. If that’s the case, he’s the most gracious host, seeing to their every need.

 

The only comfort, Bucky thinks, is that Steve managed to snatch a job as a janitor and handyman some weeks ago and thus has already spent a significant amount of time scoping the place out.

 

“Let’s go, honey pie,” calls Stark, already waiting for Bucky by the stairs. The hotel staff has already begun carrying their luggage inside and something in Bucky wants to help carry the bags inside, though he knows he should take his cues from Tony and Tony is not carrying a damn thing.

 

*

“Game on,” Tony whispers as they wait in line in the lobby. He pulls out his million dollar smile, puts an arm around Bucky’s waist and pulls them closer together. “Smile.”

 

Bucky smiles. His face feels like it’s aching, but he smiles. He’s not really the smiley type, not anymore. Steve can usually make him smile, but Steve’s not here right now and therefore Bucky feels his smile may not be as genuine as it may have been had his boyfriend been by his side instead of the genius billionaire that is.

 

He’s dragged from his thoughts of Steve by the sound of Tony demanding to be given the key to their suite and at the same time groping Bucky’s ass.

 

In broad daylight, with Britney Spears standing five feet away. Bucky briefly wonders if he could bat Tony’s hands away without blowing their entire cover.

 

Probably not.

*

Their room is _nice._ It’s huge, for starters, with lots of natural light and a bed that looks like it could probably fit fifteen people and three dogs comfortably.

 

Bucky just lies in the middle of it, marveling at how soft it feels. He sends Steve a series of snapchats that definitely doesn’t show his double chin in every single one while Stark pokes around the room, declaring the shower “good enough.”

 

It’s way more than good enough in Bucky’s humble opinion. Granted, he’s used showering beneath a trickle of lukewarm to ice cold water in a moldy shower. Tony’s probably never even stepped foot inside a bathroom like that.

 

“So, how about we go for a walk?” asks Tony after a while. “Check the place out, so to speak.”

 

They don’t have all the time in the world, is the thing. Natasha brought in the news of the Astoria being used as a gateway for smuggling stolen alien weaponry with the implication that the next huge batch would be dispatched within the month. So they have to work fast if they want to catch the bad guys in the act.

 

They leave their room quickly, walking in amicable silence. Bucky spots several security cameras, just like Steve told them would be the case, and reaches out to intertwine his fingers with Tony’s. He’s not good at acting like he’s sickeningly in love, but he’ll give it a damn good shot. For the benefit of the cameras and whatever other guests they may bump into, Bucky more or less plasters himself onto Tony, giving a simpering smile and resigning himself to spending the rest of the evening with Tony’s hand planted just above his ass for the rest of the evening.

 

The thing is, here he is Jim Buchanan and Jim Buchanan is good enough at pretending he’s in love with Anthony Stark that Anthony Stark himself believes him. So he has to at least try.

 

*

The first couple of days of their stay leads to a big load of nothing. Whiting has yet to make an appearance, which annoys Bucky to no end. Did they go through all this trouble of notifying the New York Times and all the gossip magazines the world has to offer that Tony Stark is on vacation at the Astoria Spa and Hotel Resort for nothing?

 

They even sent a few of the magazines a few “paparazzi” photos of Tony and Bucky frolicking on the beach. Which, for the record, Bucky is never doing again.

Being forced to wear lime green speedos that hides nothing while climbing Tony like he’s a god damn tree in Central Park and Stevie laughing his ass off in the background while taking photos has done nothing for Bucky’s confidence. And the therapist Natasha recommended him says it’s good if he tries rebuild his confidence to its former glory.

 

But, and it has to be said, Steve has a knack for taking artistic photos, even if the subjects of said photo are in no way artistic themselves. Bucky will never see that dressing gown of Tony’s the same way ever again. The whole experience was traumatizing for everyone involved.

 

Despite their efforts, though, Whiting himself has yet to grace them with an appearance. His assistant, Tillie – a woman that gets on Bucky’s nerves in a way he can’t really explain – has stopped by to welcome them to the hotel and to tell them her boss hopes they’re enjoying their stay.

 

“You know,” says Tony once the woman has left them alone to continue their tanning process by the pool, “she’s just your type. Red hair, looks like she could kill a man with her thighs alone – she’s practically the whole package.”

 

“What of it?” asks Bucky, trying – and failing – to get comfortable and not accidentally flash someone while doing so. He just knows Natasha’s back home, cackling with laughter at the thought of the speedos she bought him. He sends her a snapchat consisting of him flipping her off.

 

“I’m just saying – and this is just an idea,” Stark says, lowering his voice as a family of four walks by, “maybe you could try getting close to her. Considering we’re getting nowhere with Whiting.”

 

“I’m supposed to be your man, though,” counters Bucky. “I can’t just go around putting moves on somebody else.”

 

Stark scoffs at that. “Please, everybody here already thinks you’re in it for the money anyway. I’m probably paying off your student loans, let’s be honest.”

 

Bucky gasps theatrically. “They do not! I happen to think I’m very convincing.”

 

“They totally do. Face it, murderbot, I’m your sugar daddy.”

 

Bucky grimaces at the thought of Tony actually being his sugar daddy and then grins. “Well, then, daddy, how about you buy me another drink?”

 

Tony just sighs, grabbing his wallet.

*

 

“I’m gonna have to seduce Tillie Harrington,” Bucky explains. “It’s the only way.”

 

Steve glares at him. “That wasn’t part of the plan.”

 

“I’ll make it up to you, baby. Promise. But we’re getting nowhere with Whiting. He won’t even come down to say hello. And you know those tunnels we found on the blueprint?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Seems like they’re a bust. So Tillie Harrington it is.”

 

Steve continues glaring. Bucky sighs.

  
“I’m not gonna actually do anything. I’ll just spin her a story about how I’m with Tony for the money and how I’m feeling incredibly lonely and see if she bites. Besides, it’s Jim Buchanan’s reputation that’s on the line, not mine.”

 

*

Getting Tillie alone takes longer than Bucky thought it would. She seems to always be busy, no matter what time of day it is.

 

In the end, there’s no need for seduction when he finally does get her alone. She eats his story up like it’s the tastiest food she’s ever tasted. And, and this is the important part, she brings him into Whiting’s personal office. Because he begged her for a place where they could be alone and where Tony wouldn’t be able to find them.

 

She’s out like a light within fifteen minutes of drinking the wine Tony got through a special delivery service known as Natasha fucking Romanova. So Bucky lays her down on the uncomfortable sofa Whiting keeps in his office, removes her shoes and goes to town on Whiting’s special files.

 

As it turns out, there are working tunnels beneath the hotel. Now they just have to find a way in.

 

*

Putting a finger to his lips to tell Tony he needs to shut the fuck and get with the program, Bucky slowly sinks to his knees. No need to spook Tony into running away or something dumb like that. Tony, who hasn’t been blessed – or cursed, whichever way you want to look at it – with hearing way better than the ordinary human, looks a little freaked out. “Hey Tin-Man, I was totally joking earlier-”

 

Bucky ignores him, instead moving his hands up to begin removing Tony’s belt. Tony reacts by flinching away and backing straight into a shelf, hitting his head. “Ouch! Fuck, don’t do that! I’m a dead man walking already Barnes, no need to make your boyfriend even more mad!”

 

Just as Bucky is about to reply, the door to the supply closet they’re currently hiding in is wrenched open revealing a young man on the other side, his eyes nearly bugging out of his head at the sight of them. Tony honest to god squeaks at the sight of him. Bucky wants to laugh at the looks on both their faces, but doesn’t. Instead, he forces himself to appear embarrassed, letting out a tiny, squeaky little, “Hey.”

 

“Hey,” the young man says – Luke, his name-tag informs them – while looking like Christmas has come early. “Don’t let me interrupt or anything.”

 

Bucky let’s his lips curl into a smile as he gets up from the floor, dusting away dirt from his knees. “We were just leaving anyway. Sorry about this, pal. Just can’t help myself sometimes, you know?”

 

He widens his smile as he pushes past Luke, pulling Tony with him. “Sorry if we ruined your day!” he yells once they’re further down the corridor, leaving Luke standing baffled by the supply closet. “Won’t happen again, promise!”

 

He makes a show of frantically pushing Tony inside their room, shutting the door behind them with a bang.

 

He’s so sleeping on the couch tonight.

 

*

 

“I’m still mad at you,” Tony mumbles as they sit down for lunch in the crowded restaurant.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky tells him. “More like I’m still mad at you. Tillie won’t take the hint and leave me the fuck alone now.”

 

“What did you tell her anyway?”

 

“Just some shit about how you’re my sugar daddy and how I’m so very lonely. And now she thinks that because I confided in her it means I’m in love with her.”

 

Tony snorts.

 

“Sorry,” he says, not sounding sorry at all. “It seemed like a good idea at the time.”

 

They spend the rest of the lunch on their respective phones, working. Well, Tony’s probably working, Bucky’s mostly just sending snapchats to Natasha and Steve, acting like a little shit. And pretending to be seething with anger when Tony openly starts flirting with their waitress for everyone to see.

 

*

 

“You guys need to act more like a couple,” Steve hisses at him from where he’s leaning against a lamppost. He has his phone pressed to his ear and an unlit cigarette that he's never going to smoke dangling from his fingers. His toolbox is by his feet and Bucky jokingly kicks at it as he walks past.

 

“How so?” asks Bucky out of the corner of his mouth, sitting down on a bench across from Steve. Just a dude enjoying the glorious sunshine and heat, nothing to see here.

 

“The girls were talking about you in the kitchen, wondering what’s up.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Apparently you were bickering during lunch? I don’t know. You’re not convincing enough.”

 

“Everybody bickers sometimes,” grumbles Bucky, but makes a note to tell Tony they need to act way too sweet at dinner. Apparently the girls in the kitchen notice way too many things.   


*

A week passes without too many mishaps. They spend most of their time by the pool, leaving the actual investigating of the tunnels to Steve, who has more of a reason of going down to the basement than any of the actual guests do. Bucky has tried twice, only to be ambushed by Tillie, narrowingly avoiding being dragged into a supply closet both of those times. He thinks Tillie now thinks that Jim Buchanan is scared shitless of what Tony Stark would do if he found out about his boyfriend straying, since he always turns her down, despite being the once who sought her out in the first place.

 

Whatever, it’s not like he’ll ever see her again.

 

“I’m going for a walk,” Bucky tells Tony one night once they’ve finished eating dinner. “Want to join me?”

 

That sentence is the one they’ve agreed upon to signal that Bucky is going to seek out Steve and that there may or may not be kissing involved. Tony waves him off, playing at being disinterested at spending time with his boyfriend. “Nah. You go, I’ll just have a few drinks at the bar and call it a night.”

 

Bucky nods and stands up. Bending down to give Tony a sloppy kiss on the cheek, he grins. “Kay. Text me when you’re ready to head back, okay?”

 

Tony wipes Bucky’s spit off of his cheek. “Sure, mom,” he says, smirking.

 

Knowing that Tony will stay at the bar for as long as Bucky and Steve need him to, Bucky smiles. Despite their differences and constant arguing about trivial things, Tony is a good one.

 

*

 

Disaster strikes while they’re in the middle of fucking and Bucky is enjoying himself immensely. He just happens to open his eyes for some reason he no longer remembers and catching one of the girls from the staff watching him and Steve going at it.

It’s kind of funny how horrified she looks, actually.

 

Before Bucky’s managed to both untangle himself and alert Steve to their intruder, the girl has taken off, running down the hall. Bucky briefly contemplates running after her but decides against it. It’s his own fault, really, for being so horny for Steve he forgot to check that the door had been locked behind them.

 

So instead, he drags Steve into the shower with him and blows Steve in order to at least delay the freakout he knows is coming from his boyfriend.

 

And then he frebrezes the shit out of the suite and goes to find Tony.

 

*

Great, now the whole resort thinks he’s a cheating bastard only using Tony for his money. The girl – Robin, according to her name-tag – had pretended she hadn’t actually stood and watched him and Steve have sex, which, more credit to her, Bucky doesn’t think he would’ve been able to keep his mouth shut had the roles been switched around.

 

He probably would’ve told Tony out of spite if he’s being honest. Because he did kind of threaten the poor girl, despite Steve’s pleading to let him handle the whole thing. As if.

 

*

 

Robin does tell Tony about his boyfriend’s cheating ways. Except Tony doesn’t act like they agreed upon – which was to continue with the act for just a little while longer, since they’ve now managed to find actual evidence against both Thomas Whiting and, as it turns out, Tillie Harrington – and tells the girl all about who Steve and Bucky actually are.

 

This is all Tony’s fault, Bucky decides while they wait for the girl to wake up – because she went and fucking fainted – Steve making distressed noises all the while. It’s not good for Captain America’s image, he says, to be found anywhere near passed out young women.

 

Bucky just laughs.

 

*

 

They have to rush to be able to arrest Whiting and Harrington before they leave the Astoria all together. Apparently, the entire reason Whiting never graced them with his presence in the first place was because Tony Stark is Iron Man and that’s a big no, no, no matter how much publicity his presence brings to the Astoria.

 

Honestly, Bucky’s a little disappointed. He’d been imagining a huge battle, maybe an earthquake or two, the restaurant falling on their heads, that kind of thing. In the end, Captain America arrests a very mousey and cowardly man and the woman posing as his assistant by throwing his shield once and declaring game over.

 

Once they’ve cleaned themselves off and watched Tillie, screaming and crying, being carted off to spend the night in a jail cell, Tony gets on his phone to Pepper.

 

“I wanna buy this hotel,” is all he says and Bucky can hear Pepper’s deep sigh on the other end of the line.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you liked it!


End file.
